When Your Ex Sends A Text Message After The Breakup: What To Do
April 25, 2011 by Persha Davis
Filed under Break up Advice
You are really hurt over your recent breakup; You want get past the breakup pain and move on as quickly as possible. Just when you think you can pull yourself together and get life going on the “normal” track…
What do you do, when your ex sends you a text?
Well, this really depends on what you want from your ex. So here are 3 scenarios that might be able to relate to.
(This may seem pretty straightforward but when you are going through a difficult breakup what you should do and what you want to do often differ!)
1. You want nothing to do with your ex
When your ex sends a text message and you are certain that you want nothing to do with you ex, it’s pretty obvious what your next move should be.
Ignore the text message -> delete it without reading it!
A fair warning… I have gone the “I’ll just ignore it” route, and failed miserably. The thing is when your ex sent a text, even if you don’t read it you feel the urge to read it; to know what it is!
The other option is to let your ex know that you don’t want to be contacted again.
2. You want to be just friends with your ex
If you plan to remain “just friends”, make sure that correct expectations are set initially. If you are the one who dumped your partner, it’s possible that your ex is still in love with you or cares about you. Your friendliness may be misinterpreted as a sign of getting back together.
3. You want to get your ex back
It may be a good sign that your ex sent you a message. However, don’t jump into the conclusion that you got the text because your ex wants to get back together with you. Try to find out the actual reason for the text message. (I don’t mean to shatter all your hope, but it could well be that your ex misses you or wants something from you!)
(side note: I’ve written previous post on Should I Consider Getting Back With My Ex After Being Dumped?, which you might find useful)
Anyways, you are probably thrilled to receive the message and you want to immediately text or call back. But, don’t be too eager to respond to the message. You don’t want to give the impression that you’ve been waiting by the phone to hear from your ex, even though it may be the truth.
Also, keep the reply short. It should be “bait” to get a longer conversation going, so don’t detail out everything that happened while the two of you were apart.
This first text could be the first step towards reconciliation. Remember there is a long way to go.
Read through Reverse your breakup for some practical tips on how to actually get your ex back.
At the end of the day, whatever you decide to do, make sure it’s a firm decision and you don’t change your mind later.
For example, if you simply decide to just ignore the text, really do it. Don’t let your curiosity get the best of you.
I wish you the best!
