Final GoodBye – A Letter To Mr.Dumped
I was spring cleaning my hard disk and came across this email. This is an actual letter I wrote to someone about 5 years ago. Looking back at it now, I feel so naive and immature for being so desperate! I should have just moved on without hoping. Of course, at the time I was totally, into this guy and that’s the last thing I wanted to do. Anyways, I thought of publishing this here, to show you that there was a time in my life where I was this stupid!
I went for a wedding recently and there was an inspiring sermon. Long story short, the priest had asked the groom why he was getting married to her. The groom had replied saying, “I can’t imagine a life without her”. Then the priest went on to say that usually guys reply saying “Because I want to spend the rest of my life with her” or “Because I love her” or etc…and that this guy’s reply was different yet appropriate. Anyway, it made me realize that I too, need someone to feel the same way about me… Someone to think that he can’t imagine a life without me. I need someone who would take a chance on me, despite the uncertain future, someone who would think that the trouble is worthwhile.-Which brings me to this mail.
I have honestly tried to be a ‘just friend’ to you, but it’s not working for me Mr.Dumped. The more I talk to you, the more I meet you, I get more attached. And it really scares me. ‘Cos you said you just want to be friends and that you have no feelings for me.
I am glad that you were honest with yourself and told me that you don’t have feelings for me. I don’t like it, but I do respect your choice.
I don’t want to force you into doing something you don’t want to. And I certainly don’t want to change you. As I see it, the only option is for me to change. I can’t hold on to something I don’t have.
So, it’s about time I said good-bye to you Mr.Dumped, I won’t be calling you, SMS’n or emailing you ever again. I have given this a lot of thought and I really am serious when I write this mail.
I know that emailing is a coward and cold way of saying it. I admit it. However, If I called you with the intent of saying this, I wouldn’t be able to do it without crying. And I didn’t want you to witness that. I don’t know what we have, whatever it is; I want it to end in a good note.
I am not doing this to be mean to you. In my heart, I know I have done everything possible to make it work between us. When it came to you, I had no ego left to massage. Mr.Dumped, I am not mad at you or I don’t hate you. I cherish the one and half years we had; The x’mas poem I wrote for you, the silly fights we had, playing the piano over the phone, the first time I met you, the movies we went to …. And more….I really was comfortable around you; both in phone conversations and meeting you in person. ‘THANK YOU’ for all that. I still am glad that I met you.
I hope you find whoever you are looking for. And I hope for your sake, your lady chosen finds you special, and treats you well. It’s out of my hands now.