Just when you think you will be ok, something reminds you of your ex and instantly your inner voice will ramble one of the below or something similar!

I will just make a quick call to say hi
Just this once, I will meet him or her
There is no harm in sending one SMS.

Resist The Urge To Call Your Ex

1. Get rid of everything that reminds you of your ex

Toss out anything that even remotely reminds you of your ex. This includes things like photographs, old love letters and gifts your ex has given you. I have found this to be very difficult at first, but looking back at it now, I realize that it’s a necessary, step. Hanging on to even one thing can result in you still feeling attached to your ex, so it’s important to ensure that everything goes.

If you find this too hard to do, ask a close friend to help. It will be a bonding experience for both of you and it will help them to feel that they’ve really lent a helping hand in your time of need.

2. Don’t Google your ex!

When you are not with your ex, you are curious about what they are up to. Have you found someone new? Are you still thinking of me? the questions are endless. You are desperate to find the answers and you take the task to the internet. From Facebook to myspace, you want to take a peek at their lives and see how they’re doing. DON’T. Trying to find out details about your ex will only fuel your urge to call your ex. So, stay away!

3. Catch yourself making excuses to call your ex

In your mind you will find some sort of excuse to call your ex. Whether your house got burned or your cat ran away, don’t call your ex! Drama is not a reason to stir up a phone call to the ex. If you really feeling like you need to talk to someone, call a friend until the feeling passes.

4. Keep yourself occupied

When you are sitting still, your thoughts can play tricks on you. It is better to stay busy so you won’t think about your ex, and won’t have the urge to call your ex.
If there is a sport that you enjoy, make it a point to pencil that into your schedule. A set of tennis, swimming in the pool, or anything that takes your energy and your concentration will help keep your mind off of your misery and wanting to call your ex.
If you run out of things to do, here are ways to keep busy after a break up

5. Delete your ex’s phone number from your mobile!

Yes, yes, you have to! During my recent break up I deleted the phone number and then talked myself into being “mature” and added it right back after a couple days. Big mistake! It really does help when you can’t even see their name in your phonebook, for at least a few months!

6. Let go. The break up happened for a reason

Be realistic about what went wrong. Perhaps, the relationship wasn’t working as well as you wanted to believe and that it is actually for the best that it has ended. When you miss your ex, it’s extremely hard to focus on the “bitter truth”.
So here’s something you don’t want to hear,
It takes two people to make a relationship work and when one person wants out, obviously THAT person isn’t your soul mate.

You need to cut yourself off emotionally and physically (and psychologically!) from the relationship. The main way to do that is to stop talking to your ex. You have to stay in control, and resist the urge to call your ex.

This week has been quite a dreaded week. Tune into watch a favorite TV series, a Valentine’s Day gift or some related message is thrown right in front of your face. It’s that time of the year, where you see a red heart shaped something, every corner you turn.
This is all well and good if you are in a loving relationship, and can look forward to an evening of romance (and more!). Hopefully, your partner will remember that it’s Valentine’s Day (how can anyone forget it, when it’s such a constant reminder!) and show great appreciate of how wonderful it is to have you as a partner.
Then there’s a flip side where you can’t bare to hear words like “single,” “happy,” and “valentine” in one sentence. This is more applicable if you are getting over a break up or have been single for a while; Valentine’s Day can be an annoying nightmare. You want to wake up from it as soon as possible, but reality is making a great effort to prolong every possible minute!

I made a promise to myself last Valentine’s Day (2009), “I am not going to be single for next year’s Valentine’s Day”. Faster than I could blink 2010 arrived and fast forwarded to today. Sadly, I am still staring at the same bleak path. It’s not the chocolate wrapped in fancy paper, nor the giant teddy bears or the roses that I long for. It’s much much more…
So how is it that a sexy, smart, successful and charming individual is single on Valentine’s Day?

Why the F*** am I single? (while I’d like to answer that here, it deserves a post of its own.. which will come in the future. Stay tuned!)

You might think I am desperate. May be I am. But for the right person. How many “wrong” people should I date before I find the right one? How many “wrong” relationships should I be in before I can live “happily ever after”? (Dear God, if you have a plan, I don’t understand it!)

Getting Over You Getting Over Me

He’s the first thing I think about every day….. How is he? Does he miss me, like I miss him? How do I get him back? … And another day without him begins.

There’s no denying it; Getting over a break up can be one of the most difficult, heart-wrenching things you’ll ever have to do. You can cry, eat a pound of ice cream and write angry letters to your ex in your online journal, but eventually you have to face reality.

Getting Over You: My Story

Once upon a time (about one year ago) the guy I was madly in love with ended our relationship. (I prefer to say that instead of “he dumped me, abruptly”!) There wasn’t a lot of warning signs on my end. He’d been a bit aloof in the weeks prior, but he brushed it off as “too much work”. I was led to believe that it was work-related stress and accepted that with blind faith.

The few months that followed were miserable. We continued to talk. I was convinced the break up was a big mistake and that he will eventually come to his senses and we will get back together. I was completely absorbed with “what did I do wrong?” “What did I miss?” He had been an amazing boyfriend, that it was very hard for me to consider anything he had done wrong (except dumping me of course!).

Getting Over Me: The Bitter Side

We continued to be “just friends”. A couple months after we broke up, I still went to certain gatherings with him, celebrated his birthday with him, I gave him thoughtful Christmas gifts… etc. I was miserable, but he dangled hope in front of me!

Then in January, I found out that he started seeing someone else. Later, I heard that he had spent Christmas with her family. That’s when I went from miserable to totally devastate.

Getting Over You, Getting Over Me: Lessons learned

Perhaps, that was the whack on the head I needed to move on; let go. That was the moment I realized, there was no point hoping of a future with him. I felt really stupid & ashamed for the way I was pining after him.

1. One of the things that keep most people from moving on (& getting over a break up!) is, holding on to false hope. Some are stuck in limbo with the idea that there might be a chance of getting back together with their ex’s.

2. If you were the one that was being dumped (aka, your partner who called things off! ), often the onus of reuniting lies on them. If you go chasing after someone who is not willing to take you back, not only will you aggravate your relationship with them, you will also damage your self esteem.

3. Being “Just Friends” doesn’t always work. Ok so you tell this person you just want to be friends now. That is probably not a good idea. You will have to deal with hearing about them moving on and seeing other people, which leads to my next point!

4.Jealousy is self destructive. Seeing the one you were with, in the arms of someone else.. gosh it’s damn annoying and frustrating! Jealousy often leads you to do very stupid things, which you might regret later!

Finally, the most important one… getting over a broken heart is a long-term process. You will need to work through your feelings, reach out to others, and focus on yourself. Give yourself permission to experience your feelings as they occur.